


Questions and Answers

by Not_You



Series: Charismatic Minifauna [1]
Category: Nero Wolfe - Rex Stout
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Cats, Character Study, Gen, Headcanon, Languages and Linguistics, Pre-Canon, Short, Spiders, not that it matters much
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-01-16
Updated: 2015-01-16
Packaged: 2018-03-07 19:38:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 544
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3180677
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Not_You/pseuds/Not_You
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Archie's daemon is impertinent.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Questions and Answers

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Parhelion](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Parhelion/gifts).



There are people who say Nero Wolfe doesn't really have a daemon. I say that he may be a pain in the neck, but that he's still human, and despite how still she always sits, Aletheia is no illusion. She could be most of the time, sure. A tasteless lapel ornament, some kind of Halloween joke out of season. Most of the time she doesn't so much as twitch a leg. Not like Bernadette, who's always trying to give me away with ears and tail and whiskers. I've noticed that a lot of dicks have very inexpressive daemons; spiders and snakes and all those other critters girls don't like.

When Aletheia does deign to move, it's a treat to watch. One leg will quiver, and then another, and then each of the eight start to move in sequence, like she's just remembering how. After fussing with those fanning legs like a maiden aunt with a full skirt, she'll make her deliberate, creepily graceful way up Wolfe's neck and into his hair to murmur into his ear the way daemons do. When she has had her say, she goes further up to settle atop his head and peer out through his hair with her eight glassy little eyes, as if they worked worth a damn. She looks like a particularly gruesome hat that way, and I have always enjoyed the picture they make. Her other major route is to trundle her way down to his hand, sometimes wandering over the desktop and other times hunkering down in one spot like a paperweight, both of them deep in thought.

The first time Aletheia ever spoke to Bernadette came shortly after I had started working for Wolfe. We were sitting in the office on one of those hot summer days that make it hard to care about anything, let alone concentrate. I was actually dozing with my eyes open, which is probably how Bernadette managed to get away from me.

"Hey, boss?" she said, hopping up onto my desk. I grimaced and was about to try and shut her up before Wolfe got irritated, but Aletheia just wagged one pedipalp in a weary way that made me wonder if spiders could sweat.

"Yes, Bernadette?" Her voice was soft and husky and a lot more feminine than we had expected. She sounded smoky, and right on the edge where bored almost sounds seductive, instead.

"I know you're a tarantula, but what kind are you?"

"Goddammit, Bernadette," I muttered. I didn't even have the will to flick her ear, something we both hated but that I would inflict on her at moments like this.

"I am a _Theraphosa blondi_ , also known by the rather vulgar common name of Goliath Bird-Eating Spider," Aletheia said. Her golden hair gleamed in the one ray of sun that had defeated the blinds to shine down on Wolfe.

"Blondie is right," Bernadette said, flicking her tail and performing the feline version of my own manic grin.

"While annoying, your etymology is not inaccurate." From there Wolfe started discoursing about Latin roots, and we listened, Bernadette cuddling into my lap and giving me big disingenuous kitten eyes. I stuck my tongue out at her but cradled her in my arms anyway, learning all about linguistics.

**Author's Note:**

> Aletheia is named for the word, which kind of means truth but also means completely revealed. You know, that thing Wolfe doesn't really do.
> 
> Bernadette is called that because it's one of the only female names I could find that meant 'brave,' which was the closest I could get to the 'bold' in Archibald.


End file.
